2003-01-08

hello diary

how's it going? feeling lonely? neglected?

join the club.

i want to write in here. i do, but i don't have anything good to write. nothing good.

i'm a woman on the verge.

i can't do anything. i feel like i can barely get showered and dressed some mornings. a lot of mornings. i just want to lie around. it's not healthy.

i'm pretending to be sane.

i went out tonight for a bit. drank a fair amount but didn't really feel it. left. as soon as i walked outside i just started crying. other than some weird sense of longing and sadness i really cannot explain why. it's not like i had a bad time. i didn't.

i don't want to be depressed again. it's not fun. so i guess my first step is to figure out why. if it's some chemical or not.

alas.

one good thing happened today. i found a quarter! sweeeeet.

ok. gotta run. i promise my next entry will be jaunty and care free.

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