2002-09-13

well, a couple of bits of good (sort of) news for the week.

first, j gives me premium instead of rail because i'm special. well, i'm not sure if that's why, but why else would he do that? it doesn't really mean anything. but it was nice to find out that he thinks well enough of me to do that. and that explains my complete lack of a hangover last week. he must have a girlfriend. how could he not? especially around here.

second, that boy, that boy with whom i am unnaturally obsessed no longer has a girlfriend. that doesn't really make me feel all that much better. because it's just a matter of time before the next one comes along. i wish i didn't have all these stupid feelings for him. it's seriously counterproductive. i'm tired of thinking about it. writing about it. obsessing about it. and feeling completely irrational. before it was ok. i mean, that's how i knew i was in love with him. but now i don't see the point.

ok, about my job. i hate it. it's time to get out. fuck being fully vested. fuck job security. i'd like to anyway.

i think i'm coming down with something nasty.

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