2002-10-04

i suppose if farscape isn't going to be on i'm going to have to find a life. something to do on friday nights.

maybe it's ok that the people i know don't seem to pay me any mind. maybe there's a good reason for it.

i guess i'll spend the weekend pondering that one.

i want to see my parents but i don't think driving is going to be very relaxing.

work was difficult this week. the stress and the joys of womanhood have taken their toll physically. i expect to have a nasty cold by this time next week. well, maybe not. i've been hittin' the c because the the lack of Fe. i still don't have any red blood cells which means no O to the brain. i'm sure the alcohol isn't helping.

basically it seems i just can't take care of myself.

i've done a good job of nothing thinking about j the last few days. honest. i start and i stop myself immediately. it's very hard. of course i dream about him every night. WHY???????? it's torture. the last time i saw him he ignored me. so i've decided to stop kidding myself.

i need some water. and a bed and maybe a little pink pill.

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